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Tag Archives: truth

Breathing God In

12 Nov

Today I decided to post something maybe not so typical of “freshfitnhealthy”. Sometimes, I like to just share my thoughts, feelings, and journey through life as I experience it.

Have you ever heard a song over 100 times, yet when hearing it at just the right moment and truly listening to the lyrics of it,  it resonates so much inside of you or evokes strong emotions?

On my run last night, I was listening to my christian worship songs I have on my iPhone, and this song’s lyrics just hit me…

“Taking hold, breaking in
The pressures all need to circulate
Mesmerized and taken in
Moving slow, so it resonates
It’s time to rest, not to sleep away
My thoughts alone, try to complicate
I’ll do my best, to seek you out
And be myself, and not impersonate

[Chorus:]
I tried so hard to not walk away
And when things don’t go my way
I’ll still carry on and on just the same
I’ve always been strong
But can’t make this happen
‘Cause I need to breathe, I want to breathe you in
The fear of becoming
I’m so tired of running
‘Cause I need to breathe, I want to breath you in
I want to breathe you in”

(Breathe You In by Thousand Foot Krutch)

Some of the lyrics I’ve bolded are what specifically resonated inside of me last night. In a world that is constantly screaming in your ear to do this and do that, sometimes (almost always) I’ve realized I forget that I need rest. Not just physical rest at night as I sleep (even though I have been lacking in that category as well up here on the college schedule), but just mental rest.

breathein

“It’s time to rest, not sleep away”. Wow. How often do I find myself either so extremely busy that I’m never resting and enjoying the little things God has provided for me as enjoyment? Or the other extreme, that I am going at such a pace, that I’m just “sleeping away” through the motions of my day to day schedule of “things to do”, and not truly living on purpose.

What do I mean by living on purpose? I mean that I believe God has created us for a purpose, and that each day He places things in our lives, either things that will grow us, or things that allow us to better others or the atmosphere we are in. But when I allow myself to get so busy in the world’s day to day chaos (which is so hard not to), I truly feel like I miss out on so many of those things.

Like I always wonder, how many times has God placed someone in my path on a certain day, that truly needed some words of encouragement or just someone to talk to…yet my mind is so set on the next thing I have to do, that I just say a passing by “hi! how are you?” Not really allowing for a genuine conversation to begin.

And then more of the lyrics stood out as the song continued to play. “Not try to impersonate”. This world is constantly screaming in our ears to be “normal”, to fall into the “perfect girl” mold that society has made up in their mind. Good looks, the newest, trendiest outfit, straight A’s, very involved, successful career…the list goes on and on.

But again, I believe God has made each and every one of us unique. Each with a specific purpose. Like Psalm 137 says, we are each “fearfully and wonderfully made”. Yet sometimes I find myself just “trying to fit in” to what the world tells me I should be.

fearfull made

My purpose in writing this? Just to share where my heart has been. For me, I need to take a step back and simply rest. Truly quiet myself, and breathe God in. I need to not try to impersonate others around me, but be myself. I want to quiet those complicating thoughts inside of me, constantly thinking of the next thing I need to do or the next thing that may stress me out, and live on purpose. Simply put, I want to live FOR God. Breathing Him in each and every moment.

Have you allowed yourself true rest? Are you striving aimlessly to be like those around you, or are you allowing your unique growth and character to develop so that you can become God’s perfect YOU?

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What is Unconditional Love?

27 Jul

Do I even know the true definition of this anymore?

Everything of this world is constantly promising me love, yet is also constantly letting me down. Whether it is physical things I turn to in search for some sense of security, or the closest of my relationships, they all fail me.

But there is great news. There is something that will never fail us. A friend that does exemplify the true meaning of unconditional love. His name is Jesus.

When I hit an all time low, when I am running away from everything, when I am in the darkest of places, Jesus stays right by my side. When I feel like everyone else has forgotten me, or has run the opposite way in hopes to avoid me, Jesus is calling out my name. When I fall and cannot get back up, Jesus reaches out his hand to raise me up once again. Even when I am looking in every other place for comfort and security except for Him, when I disobey and blow him off, He remains the same. He continually loves me. That, is the definition of unconditional love.

“I loved you at your darkest” Romans 5:8

Jesus has a sense of humor I’ve realized. Sometimes He speaks to me through church services, and praise music..but then sometimes He speaks to me in humorous ways.

Meet Gracie, my lovely Labrador puppy (not exactly a puppy anymore).IMG_1107

There is no perfect example of unconditional love except Jesus, but He has provided me this gem as a reminded of what it looks like. See, no matter what I do, how many times I scream at her, how many times I forget to take her out because I’m “too busy”, or how many times I simply just ignore her presence because I have too much to do, she still loves me.

Last summer when I was still competitively running each day, I was injured during a run and was stuck laying and sitting for two weeks straight with over 30 stitches in my knee (I’ll spare you a picture of the actual battle wound, my coach said it looked like a shark bite). I was feeling so low, as I couldn’t run anymore, couldn’t even go outside much, or do the simple things I once took for granted. I felt like a lot of my friends didn’t understand what I was going through, and didn’t reach out to me in a time of need. But one thing exemplified love still (ignore my lovely just-got-done-crying-for-hours self).

IMG_1858

It was the cutest thing. She is usually very rough, but she knew. And she slowly one leg at a time came into my lap as I sat at the computer chair with my leg elevated. It was like she knew she needed to be gentle, but she knew I needed some love right then and there.

Then the other day Jesus reminded me once again of His unconditional love through this amazing little pup of mine. I was “too busy” to give her any attention, and unfortunately, my stress got the best of me and I screamed at her when she began whining to go out. I didn’t have “time to waste” on her when I had organic chemistry that needed to be done (even though I made time to lay out and go in my pool). But even after screaming at her and striving to ignore her the best I could, she still showed me nothing but love. Even while sitting in my chair doing homework..

photo

Whether it be through diving into His word today, or through something as silly as a pet, I hope God shows you the meaning of unconditional love today, as you realize just how special the gift He has to offer is<3

I’ll leave off with my prayer for all of you today..

“And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love,
 may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people,
 to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love
of Christ..” Ephesians 3:17-18

**If you’d like to talk more about this unconditional love, or have never heard of God’s great gift He has to offer, please feel free to contact me <3.

Forgetting Your First Love

10 Jun

This post is going to be a little different than most. This is a little more personal.

I am starting to go through the book of Revelations in the Bible during my quiet times in the morning. Before you write off this post completely, whether you believe in the Bible or have a personal relationship with Christ of not, I found this so applicable in many areas, and you may as well. I couldn’t help but to pause and really meditate on a few verses I came across..

4 “However, I have this against you: You have forgotten your first love. Remember how far you have fallen. Return to me and change the way you think and act, and do what you did at first.” (Revelations 2:4-5)

It got me asking myself, have I forgotten my first love? In so many areas…sadly, I feel like the question is yes. This world screams at us for constant attention, it tells us we have to do this and this and that. It tells us that when you have free time, go busy yourself some more. It tells you that only your grades, your career, your acclamations are what is important. It tells you that once you’ve reached one height, that you are now only at the bottom of another mountain to climb.  And sometimes, when we begin to give in to the world’s screams, that constant voice that surrounds us in our daily lives,  we neglect those that deserve our love the most. Sometimes, those we once showed unconditional, constant love for, we put on the side burner, only under the assumption that they know we still love them. That we don’t have to show it. That we don’t have to put our energy or our time into them. That we don’t have to do all those “little things” that we use to in order to illustrate out love. And slowly, our love begins to fade. We wonder why we don’t “feel it”.

This was God telling a specific church that they had forgotten their first love. No, they were not some wicked church that had fallen off the deep end. God even commended them in the prior verses, saying “I know your deeds, your hard work and your perseverance..”. But he then continued on with that hard to swallow statement, “You have forgotten your first love”. He cried out for them to remember the past, to remember how they use to act, and to return to those ways.

This was very hard for me to read even though coming across it before. When I think back of the first time I truly met Christ and fell into a love relationship with him, I had so much passion, so much vigor, and so much love. I wanted to scream to the world of his goodness. And I still do. But lately, with the chaos and busyness that all of college brings, I think sometimes I forget to show him that love: to talk to him throughout my every day, to praise him continuously, to show him just how much I appreciate all He has done for me through simple acts of love and thanks. The world fights for every minute of our attention and energy, and sometimes, I find myself giving in, as I get so stressed out and anxious about the things around me, that I start to focus more on my “to-do list”, about those things I can’t control, then to focus on my relationships of love.

Not only in my relationship with the Lord, but with some of those closest to me I feel this has affected. I feel that all those “little things” I use to do to show my love, have somewhat been put on the back burner. Those I love, have in some ways been taken for granted. And that is not how it should be at all.

Whether you have a personal relationship with Christ or not, have you ever felt that you have “forgotten your first love” in some area of your life? Forgotten and forsaken the actions of love you use to show someone close to you? This isn’t me giving you a life lesson. This is me sharing my personal life journey, and hoping that maybe you can take something from it as well. If you realize you are somewhat in a place like this, there is hope. If feeling this in your relationship with Christ, He is always forgiving and merciful, ready to pick up right where you left off, growing an even more flourishing relationship. And if you are feeling this way about someone close, it’s never too late to change. Tomorrow is a new day. A chance for a change. What are you going to do? I know some changes I need to make, and it is all going to begin with prayer. With communication. And with acts of love I have lately forsaken<3

P.S. If you want to know more about a relationship with Christ, please feel free to email me. I would absolutely love to just talk to you, even if you just have questions. FreshFitnHealthy@gmail.com :)